Top image: Stephanie Lee / RICE File Photo
If you have the good fortune of heading overseas, the unspoken rule is that you must return bearing gifts.
There are other intricacies to souvenir etiquette that most Singaporeans, it seems, abide by. For example, if you’re returning from a Johor Bahru trip, souvenirs aren’t expected. If you head a little further than that though, say Malacca or Penang, then you might be silently judged for not bringing back a box of local treats.
Souvenirs started as a way for travellers to remember the places they’d visited. But as leisure travel grew more common in the late 20th century, the demand for cheap, portable items that could be easily gifted to friends and family grew.
Cut to the present day, and souvenir culture has evolved to the point where returning from a trip empty-handed might be seen as a social faux pas.
Are souvenirs still meaningful? Or have the obligations surrounding them overshadowed their original purpose—to show that you care?
And are we really worse of if that colleague that went to Australia doesn’t bring back a box of TimTams for the office pantry?
“I buy souvenirs back for my office because I saw my colleagues doing it and realised it’s a nice thing to do. I’m not a good gift giver, and I’m trying to work on it by getting snacks for the workplace. People might say it’s performative and burdensome, but that’s a bit pessimistic, I think. It’s just nice to have a little treat. It’s satisfying to do nice things for people. So if taking five minutes to get souvenirs makes our pantry a bit happier, then I want to do that.
I appreciate people buying souvenirs, but I also wonder if people are doing it out of obligation. I would hope no one is doing it because they feel like they have to. Getting someone a souvenir out of obligation is kind of antithetical to the purpose of a souvenir. Instead of ‘saw this and thought of you’, it becomes ‘I was obliged to think of you’.”
—Natalie, 23
“I don’t really go out of my way to look for gifts or souvenirs for my friends. I would only get them a gift if it was something that I definitely know they want or like. It’s not an obligation. It just makes me happy to see my friends and loved ones happy.
For the workplace, I think some people feel obliged to buy stuff because they are worried what others might think of them if they don’t bring anything back, especially if the workplace culture is very into gift-giving. These people care too much about what others think of them.
You shouldn’t suffer on your holiday stressing over what kind of gift to get for anyone. It may even backfire if you force yourself to buy something. The other party may not like it.”
—Shane, 30
“My parents always ask me not to waste my money getting them stuff. But I can tell that they’re happy when I return from my holidays with small presents for them.
At the end of the day, I think that’s the point of souvenirs. Nowadays, you can get foreign snacks and products easily online and in stores. So it’s not really about buying something that they can’t get in Singapore It’s really more about showing that you were thinking of them.”
—Michaela, 24
“I tend to buy souvenirs often for my family. I personally enjoy giving gifts and it makes me happy to see a family enjoy the stuff I give them. So I try to be careful to avoid buying impractical stuff.
I think buying gifts for the office or friends out of obligation is unnecessary. Like the rule that every time someone goes on a holiday they have to buy something back just because. I think it is more meaningful if it’s a situation where you find something that’s so good that you’re like ‘Yo, you guys need to try this.’”
—Zheng Yi, 32
“My mum loves fresh fruit and my dad loves snacks, so when I see these while I’m on holiday, I will buy them for my parents. I use this love language to thank them for putting up with me, their recalcitrant, underachieving son. I remember trying to vacuum pack and cushion Jeju oranges last April, so that they would survive the multiple flights and road trips I had to take in order to get back to Singapore.
Unfortunately, my parents are also hoarders—my many gifts to them are strewn across their bungalow. I often wonder if they think about my love for them, when these souvenirs stare back at them as they go about their day.”
—Andre, 39
“I think souvenir culture becomes excessive and crosses into overconsumption when you’re gifting too many people too many things they don’t need. It becomes more about making yourself feel good than actually considering their likes and dislikes.”
—Xin, 28
“I love buying people souvenirs because that feeling of finding a gift that you know they’ll love is unmatched. For example on a recent trip, I bought my camera-enthusiast brother a secondhand Pentax. It wasn’t cheap, but it was great to see him excited over it.
I also like getting my colleagues snacks as a way of thanking them for picking up the slack when I’m gone. I do think, though, that it shouldn’t be expected of people to bring their colleagues gifts. I wouldn’t think less of a colleague who didn’t bring something back after going on holiday. Gift-giving isn’t everyone’s love language, and that’s fine.”
—Ashley, 30
“I don’t particularly care for souvenirs. But it’s hard to tell people that because I know they mean well when they buy me things. And I don’t want them to feel unappreciated.
I just wish my friends and family would just save the money or spend it on themselves.”
—Jun Wei, 30
